becoming a person [one fragment at a time]

five days before robbie died, i dyed my hair. it was brighter and purpler than i'd expected but he loved it. i haven't dyed it since. every day i look in the mirror, watching the roots grow longer and longer, the now faded purple more of a red slowly moving down my head, and think, "this is how long he has been gone."

fragment: 2:00:00 PM: link

i still love this line: i like your hands, all full of glory.


i want my hands to be all full of glory. i have a complicated relationship with my hands. somewhere on this site, i think, is a poem partially about that. mostly i wish they were a little longer, more lithe. and right now, i wish the giant blister on my thumb was gone.


it is hard to do any number of normal day to day things with a giant burn blister on your thumb: writing, unbuttoning the top button on your jeans, lifting furniture...

fragment: 1:58:00 PM: link

5.03.2005

there is a poem in here, somewhere:
i had a 2 inch kidney stone, with no pain
i require twice as much anesthetic as most people

fragment: 7:55:00 AM: link

10.13.2004

there sits wally in the third row
wise beyond his years by virute of being dead
but still swinging his feet and fidgeting

and in comes emily sitting in the front
without so much as a how do you do
or a hey little brother
i've missed you

fragment: 6:53:00 AM: link

10.11.2004

she's taken to reading romance novels in the corner

fragment: 8:33:03 AM: link

8.10.2004

she is a desperate angle

fragment: 7:24:58 PM: link

3.31.2004

janey claire was 32 when she finally ran away from home. she supposed she might have done it earlier, but there had been cats and rents and parents and quite frankly, it had all seemed like entirely too much trouble before march 15. but, when the ides of march says beware, you beware, and off she went.

fragment: 9:40:14 AM: link

janey claire was 32 when she ran away from home. she'd been planning it since she was twelve, but she'd always been one to look before she leapt, and the looking had taken a particularly long time.

fragment: 9:40:11 AM: link

2.04.2004

this is where we stand
me on the porch, flat-footed, cold concrete, solid
she in the mud, tiptoed, gleefully tottering

fragment: 9:19:04 AM: link

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